The
Friendship Challenge
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"Two
are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either
of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and
has no one to help them up. Also, if two lie down together, they will keep
warm. But how can one keep warm alone?" Ecclesiastes 4:9-11 (NIV)
What
makes a woman tender also reveals her vulnerabilities.
What
makes a woman transparent also exposes her wounds.
What
makes a woman authentic also uncovers her insecurities.
And there
aren't many women who enjoy being revealed, exposed, and uncovered. But
establishing real intimacy with another person requires pushing past the
resistance—past the fear.
Friendship
is risky.
To be
known is to risk being hurt. But friendship can be beautiful, and worth the
risk.
We can
look to the Bible for examples of monumental friendships. In 1 Samuel 18 we
learn about the special friendship between David and Jonathan, an example of a
true bond. When Jonathan's father, King Saul, threatened David with death,
Jonathan risked his position in his father's household and warned his friend.
Jonathan
and David's friendship lasted their lifetime, and because of Jonathan's loyalty
to David, the Lord blessed them both. David eventually became king, but by then
Jonathan had died. David inquired, "'Is there anyone still left of
the house of Saul to whom I can show kindness for Jonathan's sake?'" (2
Samuel 9:1b NIV).
Don't
miss this beauty: it was customary for the present king to put to death any of
the former king's family. However, because of his and Jonathan's strong
friendship, King David tenderly provided for Jonathan's son. "I
will restore to you all the land that belonged to your grandfather Saul, and
you will always eat at my table" (2 Samuel 9:7b NIV). "So
Mephibosheth ate at David's table like one of the king's sons" (2 Samuel
9:11b NIV).
Awesome.
Inspiring. Friendship.
Yes,
friendship is beautiful. The Lord gave it to us. He knew we would need each
other to get through this life.
Think
about a friend you can make an investment in.
Not the
friend with whom you feel most comfortable. But rather one who might benefit
from seeing a little more of your tenderness, transparency, and authenticity.
Someone who might be worth a risk.
Someone
in your sphere of influence is desperate to know someone else understands.
Might we
take three steps and give ourselves a friendship challenge? Here are three
things you can do to invest in a friend:
1) Have a
conversation with her in which you honestly admit one of your vulnerabilities.
Chances are she'll reveal something to you as well. Then really commit to pray
for her. Maybe wear a watch or bracelet and every time you're distracted by it,
use this as a prompt to carry her burden in your prayers.
2) Buy or
make this friend a gift. Just because. It doesn't have to cost much. But make
an investment of time to think of something that would personally delight her.
3) Write
your friend a note to attach to the gift. In the letter, tell her at least
three things you admire about her and some way she's made a difference in your
life.
Then
deliver this little "just because" gift and note to your friend. This
friend who sometimes feels a little vulnerable. Wounded. Exposed in some way.
Your
honesty and thoughtfulness will be such a sweet investment.
For her.
For you.
For your
friendship.
Are you
up for taking the friendship challenge?
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