Take a Moment to Soak it in

"Take a moment to soak it in, relax and be grateful. Appreciate where you are on the way to where you are going, appreciate your progress.” That was the sermon that beautiful Sunday morning. The preacher continued “Stop what you are doing, pause for a minute and just take it all in. Take a moment to feel it and enjoy what you have now before you get carried away with the next thing you want.” Hearing those words took me back to a period/time when all I could do was soak it all in.

Stepping into 2017, I thought I had a plan on how I wanted everything to play out. I had carefully prayed and drawn up my goals and plans for 2017, but, what I didn’t consider was that, plans do change. Things we did not anticipate pop up and it looks like everything is getting all messed up and we feel like we are drowning, unsure of the next step to take. In moments like this, we tend to forget every other thing and all that clouds our mind, thoughts, and actions are how do we get over this, how do we handle it, how do we come up with a solution, how do we raise the money, how do we mend the relationship, how do we get the job, how do we get well again, how do we get over the bitterness and rage, how do we pass that exam, how do we … so many questions asked. 

The first quarter of the year, for me, went as planned but then, I didn’t see what was coming in the 2nd quarter. Some things came up and it looked like I was going to be homeless by the end of April... Yeah, I just said homeless *wink*... I was having some bit of accommodation issues. The 'ish' with it was that I never saw that coming at the beginning of the year so I did not have a plan. Within three weeks I needed to find a new place, raise the money, get it set up and move into it. I obviously didn’t know where to start from or what to do. I felt so confused, dejected, angry, frustrated, helpless plus I had an examination to prepare for.

At the time, I was at my wit's end and I wasn’t certain how I was going to go about it. However, I had a friend who kept telling me “Seyi, it’s no big deal, you just have to make the first move and every other thing will fall in place. Everything always sorts itself out.” Surprisingly within that 3 weeks, everything did sort itself out. I had some good friends who did all they could to ensure I settled down nicely. 

That night after my friends (Bolanle, Teedee and Tope) left, I kept saying thank you over and over again, I love you guys. I just paused in the middle of the room noticing what was around me and happening in the present moment and all I could do was soak it all in. For minutes I stood there not saying or doing anything, I was just appreciating and admiring the moment of what I had which no one could see. At that point nothing else mattered, I was simply grateful for where I was. It was magical. I wasn’t thinking about sorting the remaining bills, arranging the house, decorating, reading for my exam... I just stayed in the moment and I was very grateful. That was my moment when I soaked it all in.

Life happens fast. Whether we’re looking at the big picture or just day-to-day tasks, we always seem to be in a rush to get to the next thing. But in the hustle and bustle of it all, it seems like we’re fast-forwarding through some important stuff. We’ve gone from skimming the daily news to skimming everything. Many times we want something. We desire it, we work so hard towards it, we press to get that thing, and we pray to get it. When that thing finally comes, we need to take some time to soak it in, be grateful for it before we rush off to the next thing. That way we see the magic and miracles in our everyday lives.  

You got the job you wanted, take a moment to soak it in before pondering on your bills.

You got admission in school after so long, soak it in before worrying about school fees.

You passed that 1st stage of the exam, soak it in before worrying about the next stage.

You got pregnant, soak it in before getting anxious about wanting a boy instead of a girl. 

You finally got married, soak it in before worrying about getting pregnant.

Yes, we need to plan ahead for the next phase but it is important we enjoy every moment as they come, appreciating our achievements while working towards achieving greater ones. Try to stay present. How often are we truly present in our lives? It’s hard, isn’t it? We have so many things to do, place to be, people to see. We all know that we should slow down and enjoy life more. We may try for a little while, but then we’re off to the races again, filling our lives with more busyness and distractions.

Lean into the moment and don’t be afraid to just slow things down. It’s taking little moments in the day and just really treasuring the moments that bring out the beauty of life. Those small victories are important in winning the war.

Take a deep breath. Soak in this moment for all that it is.

IT ENDED WELL . . .

Sometimes, I wake up in the morning feeling a little bit grumpy because it's time to do it all again. Same routine everyday! Nothing different, or spectacular or probably dramatic. It's just the same old thing! On days like this, I wished I could stay in bed, pull the sheet over my head without having to do anything. Knowing that isn't an option, I just stay in bed for awhile juggling thoughts in my head, I then have some conversation with God. Hesitantly, I get out of bed, shower, get dressed, put on some bright makeup, and then go to work. 

Could be you feel the same way too . . . These are days I sleuth over my life lived, to ask, is this how I've planned all along? 

My psyche is to plan for everything, being meticulous, prim to the gilt ensure I have a well laid out plan. I always want to understand and give a reason or answer to everything in my life. I don't like to be caught off guard or in the middle of unpleasant surprises. 

Life is so daily and often filled with uncertainty, a reality that can make me very nervous. I want to know what the plan is and how that plan is going to be implemented. Details! I need details! The problem with people like me is that when our plans gets altered in anyway, it actually almost tears us down. Though I will always put up the boldness like it's all under control, deep within me I am probably shattered and a complete wreck.

Sitting all alone, looking at 2016 and how well I thought I had planned for 2016, I would say, it’s been a good year but a really tough season with lots of topsy turvy ups, unplanned events and the goosebumps of economic recession. Dare I say, for our country, tensions are running high, so many uncertainties and it's incomprehensible complexity

Now, wrapping up the year,trying to do my checks and balances, I'm not exactly sure 2016 went as planned. Many of the things entrusted to me in life were beginning to feel more like burdens than blessings. There were just a lot of little things swamping my thoughts. Feelings of inadequacy. There are so many things I’m responsible for and I'm not sure I got them all done before the end of the year. I do enough to keep things from sinking. But I just wonder if I did everything well. I wonder if I kept the relationships in my life going well. I wonder about a lot of things . . . For me when things aren't t going as planned, I build walls around my heart and I don’t want to let anyone in, especially if I know they’ll challenge me. Maybe it’s because I’m who I am, or because I am fearful of unfamiliar turf. I throw out people that matter, when feeling weak or vulnerable. 

In the last few days of this year, I planned out a trip to Ilorin, so I could spend sometime with my childhood friend and her family. Initially, trusting my makeup, which is to cancel the trip, on a second thought, I told myself I needed to do something different. Even though the trip was unplanned, it was the one best decision I've made this year. Could I pause to say, my friend has got 3 boys, ages 7, 5 and 4 so I call her Toyin and her squad. 

Spending time with them, watching them turn the house upside down, watching the boys fight, watching their mum settle fights, watching them play and all that . . . It brought so much rays of light to my prism heart. 

Year 2016, didn’t exactly go as planned I didn't achieve all I wanted, yet there were many wonderful things, which I didn't ask for that I got. The gift of each new day in 2016. The blessing of good health. The strength and grace to keep the office going. The promotion at work. The victories I have. The jewels of goodly sort that I call my family, my love for you guys is beyond what words can express. Oluwatamilore and Nadiv, I love you to the moon and beyond. For my mum and dad, thank you for moulding me into the woman I have become.Oluwamayowa I would pick you over and over again as my sister. Thank you for giving me an awesome elder brother that I never had. Samuel, Jay and Ladi, thank you for being my bigger fans. Thank you for always cheering me and believing in me. For my Git family, seeing your faces gives me a reason to go on even when I get so close to giving up. You give me the strength to still walk through those doors every day. Bolanle, Modupe, Oluwatodimu, and Motun I can't call you colleagues. I call you my family. My love for you guys is far beyond phantomable words. Hope, Omolola, Tope, Opeoluwa, Temi, Ebuka, Tunde, Abiodun, I hold you dear to my heart. For the rare gift of good friends that I have in my life. Damola, Rali, Morenike, Kofo, Bukky, Molly, Femi, Inioluwa, despite the distance between us, our friendship still stands. I love you guys plenty. Alimi sometimes I wonder how we are still friends . . . Lol . . . You know I appreciate our friendship and I love you. To Toyin and her squad, thank you always. . . By the way Ayomi is still my favourite member of the squad. . . *wink*. To you my dear friend, I know you would not want me to mention your name. Thank you for being there despite all the odds. Thank you for standing with me through turbulent times. You walked right by my side when I thought the journey was getting too exhausting. I wish I could tell you just how much you mean to me. Faced with the risk of drowning, you remained as an anchor for me. I love you so very much and you know you are irreplaceable. To the author and finisher of my faith. . . Oluwa e tobi. Ko si eni ti mo le fi se akawe yin.

Indeed, I have so much to be grateful for looking back at the year 2016. It didn’t go as I planned but I can say it ended well.